Sunday, June 24, 2012

Oops - Revisited


I recently made a request on our homeschool group website for recommendations of midwives in my area who attend births in birthing centers and at home.  One response I got was a reminder about an article that was sent to me called "Faith Healing - Trust in God, But See a Doctor".  It was about a little child (and another) who died because the parents/church believed that prayer would heal the child and that taking the child to a doctor would reveal a lack of faith in God.  Following, were some comments about people with such beliefs having their babies at home and the dangers of not getting any medical assistance.  The following is my response (edited for posting).  I spent a lot of time thinking through what I have come to believe and thought it would be appropriate to post it here.

My edited reply:

Thank you for the article.  I meant to read it, but it got away from me before I got back to it.  I read it just now and I totally agree that the use of medical care is appropriate and what happened to these children based on such beliefs was lamentable.  You did not offend me at all.  I am apparently sending the wrong message.  I hope, by the following, to clarify what I truly believe, for it is my desire to know the truth and to share the truth about God to give hope, so that others might be filled with the joy that my family and I now have in Christ Jesus, through our faith in Him.  I am still learning and I may not have everything just right, but I trust that God will lead me and teach me as I seek Him through prayer and through His word.

Please understand that I am not opposed to medical care, when needed.  I do not consider it a lack of faith, if I pray for my kids and they continue to be sick.  I consider that it might be a lack of faith, but I recognize that there may be another reason, so I ask God to heal them, and I expect that they will be healed, but I do not kick myself for lack of faith if they continue to be ill.  I remember that God is good all the time and that He works all things together for good for those who love Him and who have been called according to His good purposes.  I figure that there is a reason that they are not healed, and I do not know what the reason is.  I remember Job.  God never told him why bad things happened to Him.  Clearly, Job never wavered in his faith.  I know that our physical bodies die eventually, so it would be rather silly to think that we would always be healed of everything, just because we asked.  Eventually, my day will come, sooner or later.  Eternal life is to know the only true God and Jesus Christ, whom He sent (John 17:3).  If we live, we live to the Lord, and if we die, we die to the Lord.  Whether we live or die, we are the Lord's (Romans 14:8).

What I was trying to communicate that day (when I offended a hurting woman) was my own personal experience with the Living God as I learned to seek Him and trust Him.  I sought God, and He revealed to me that not only was He able to heal my family, but that He would heal us.  We were sick and struggling because we were living in fear and anxiety all of the time.  God showed me that He does not give me a spirit of fear, but a spirit of power and of love and of self-control.  He showed me that love was needed to bring healing to our family.  He showed me that He is love and that I needed to believe Him and trust Him.  I always believed that God was real and that He was able to do anything, I just never knew IF He would.  Therefore, I found it very difficult to pray, except in desperation, because I never expected to see any results.  Now, I pray for everything expecting to see results, because the prayers of a righteous man are powerful and effective, but I do not judge why my prayers were answered immediately, slowly over time, or seemingly not at all.  God knows why.  I have prayed for many things, with the expectation that I will see it answered with a resounding yes, and I have been blessed to see miraculous results, all glory to God, but there are some things for which I must continue to pray.  I DO seek Him and I search His word to see if there is something more for me to learn, but ultimately, God's will WILL be done.

I have learned that bad things will come our way.  God's word says that in this life we will have trouble.  Sometimes it is a direct result of our own rebellion (Psalm 107).  This was the case for me and for my family.  Sometimes it is allowed by God to test our faith (Job).  Sometimes it is the result of the enemy defending His territory when we step out in faith and proclaim the truth (Paul and believers in the early church, many died and suffered for their faith).  We can not judge that all bad things happen because of a lack of faith.  I never said that if bad things happened in someone's life that it was because of a lack of faith.  I never meant to imply it, either.  The things I said were true.  It was my testimony and my testimony is real.  Our healing was miraculous, but I wasn't seeking healing, rather I was seeking God.  My message was to seek the Lord.  Taste and see that the Lord is good.

I know I said that I asked the Lord for faith to believe and that He gave it to me.  I believed and we were healed.  That is our testimony and it is true.  My testimony is the same as those who approached Jesus physically and were healed, as Jesus pronounced, because of their faith.  God's word is true.  The testimonies given by the writers of the four gospels are true.  Therefore, it is clear that many are healed by faith, but it does not necessarily mean that if one is not healed that it was because of a lack of faith.  Clearly, sometimes it is.  I continue to walk in faith.  I continue to seek the Lord.  We continue to see healing and improvements even now.  I could write pages about all that I have to be thankful for.  I spent most of the day yesterday praising God for all of the good things I am seeing in our lives.  This does not mean that there is not any trouble in my life, just that I am not afraid of it anymore, because I know that God, who is good, is in control.  We still have a tad bit of eczema on the girls.  We still have bedwetting issues.  My three youngest children had one of the worst bugs (coughing fits followed by throwing up because it gags them, sore throat, fever, stomach pain from all of the coughing) and now my older two kids are going through it.  I do not berate myself for lack of faith because these things remain even though I prayed for healing.  I continue to pray, with thanksgiving, and I ask God if there is anything that I need to learn.  I do not know why, but I know there is a reason.  I trust God through it.

Also, we lost our fourth baby to a miscarriage.  I never believed it was a lack of faith that caused it.  I never looked back and thought that, if only I had believed a little bit more that things could be different.  We remembered how many seemingly bad things happened to Joseph, but all of it was necessary to prepare him for and to position him for the work that God had prepared for him to do, which God revealed in advance through his childhood dreams.  We thanked the Lord, after grieving the loss, for the gift of life, though short, and trusted that there was purpose in it, though we did not know what would come of it.  Indeed it was a blessing, and we still talk about our baby, named Joy, as we look back and consider the good things that have come from her very short life.  Because of her unexpected conception and her unexpected loss, we have now graciously received two, soon to be three more amazing children into our lives.  It taught our children to trust God through painful events and it taught them that they can and will recover from loss.  I'm sure there is more, but we can see that much good can come from difficult and painful circumstances.

I may be wrong, but I perceived (because of your reminder about the article being connected to my inquiry and because of the mention of home births in the comments section) that my inquiry about birthing centers and home births may have been interpreted as a rejection of medical help.  My inquiry was not because I am against medical help.  I will gladly receive it, when needed, and I would encourage others to do the same.  I am currently praying for a man related to someone in our group who had a massive heart attack.  I would never suggest that they walk away from the medical help he is receiving right now, but I pray that God would heal him.  I am praying for a seven year old boy, who recently drowned and is recovering from a brain injury.  I would never suggest that they walk away from the medical help that he is receiving.  God is working through that, and the boy's recovery is still miraculous.  When I went to the hospital for preterm contractions at 20 weeks with my third child and was told that my contractions were labor strength and five minutes apart, my cervix was 80% effaced and dilated one centimeter, and that my baby would not survive, I accepted the medicine and medical help.  I prayed through the night for my child's life, but ultimately gave her up to God, realizing that I had no power of my own to do anything to change anything that was happening.  She is now eight years old.

I have my reasons for looking into other birth options, but it is not because I am against medical help.  I am not planning on having this baby at home without any assistance, and I do not consider it a lack of faith in God to have my babies in a hospital setting.  I know that you did not say anything about this and you may not even have thought that these might be my reasons, but I wanted to clarify anyway, for my own pride.  I am fine with having my baby in a hospital (and that may be where it happens), it is just not my preference.  I am fine with medical assistance, if it is needed.  I think it would be foolish for me (me, not others) to have my baby at home unassisted because there are just too many things that I do not know.  So there it is.

I thank you for the article and for the thought it provoked.  It was good for me to think through where my faith lies and what I truly believe.  I'm still learning.  I do not think I have it all figured out.  I am constantly seeking my Heavenly Father to teach me, as I am His child and I may need Him to straighten me out on a few things here and there as I grow.  I think about how my own children think they have things figured out and those of us in the family, including our older children, who are more mature know that they have a ways to go, but we are patient with them as they grow and learn and we trust that they will get it down the road when they are developmentally ready to get it.  I figure that I am still a child and that God will teach me and correct me as I go.  I am thankful that He leads me in paths of righteousness.

No comments:

Post a Comment